The Idler

Tilbury

04 August 2005

The last time I ventured to this place I saw a diddycoy walking with his dishevelled horse, hitting it with a stick and muttering swear words. Further on the walk I saw two burnt out, abandoned cars next to the sign ‘Welcome to Tilbury’… if nothing else, it was an accurate welcome.

Then past the parade of shops where every little oik over the age of five stopped and asked me if I had a spare cigarette. Explaining that I had none on me I was called a “Cunt” a “Prick” and a “Mother’s Cunt”.

Nearing the end of my journey I walked down a quaint little cul-de-sac that had rusty, vandalised cars, abandoned cement mixers and burnt mattresses for garden furniture.

Oh and it has the highest rate of incest in Britain.

Steven