The Idler

The Politics of Affluence and Wellbeing, 15 May 07

As part of the Bristol Festival of Ideas, Tom Hodgkinson debates the concept of “affluenza” with psychologist Oliver James, Jay Griffiths (whose new book Wild, explores the need for wild places for happiness) and Tobias Jones, whose Utopian Dreams looks at alternative communities.

The Arnolfini, Narrow Quay, Bristol
http://www.arnolfini.org.uk/
Tue 15 May, 7.30pm
£6.00/£4.00 concs

A Country Diary: 52

I’M WRITING THIS week’s diary by hand as I’ve been getting increasingly fed up with computers. With pen and paper, nothing much can go wrong and also there is no outside force to come between you and the writing. The ink flows almost directly from your hand. Pen and paper also has the distinct advantages of portability and cheapness and furthermore it does not rely on electricity. And who ever reclined with an email? With pen and paper, whether reading letters or writing notes, you can strike elegant poses on the sofa.

When I sat down at my computer this morning, I banged away at the keyboard for a while. I typed in today’s date; the computer filled in extra numbers which I hadn’t asked for, and which I then had to delete. Why when writing should I have to wage constant war against the pedestrian imagination of the Californian geek who wrote the programme? Then I noticed that the “A” key wasn’t working. I was already in a foul temper as it was, a result of Henry, who is two, flinging all the Rolodex cards around the room. So my working day had started on my hands and knees, cursing parenthood as I picked up a hundred previously alphabetically ordered address cards, Well, this compute failure was too much. ”Fucking computers!” I bellowed and hurled the broken keyboard to the floor.

I reached for pen and paper and started writing. Then it occurred to me that I didn’t need the computer on my writing desk. So I unplugged it and took it out and now I plan to use it as a goldfish bowl. So I now have a nice big computer-free desk. I should add that I keep a computer on another desk, my admin desk. This one is hooked up and I use it for occasional email and for processing orders from the Idler shop. And for typing up my writing. Yes, I am going nearly Luddite. And it feels fantastic.

YESTERDAY I WENT up to the vegetable patch and sowed turnips (white globe) and peas (alderman). Before sowing the peas I dug a trench and filled it with half-rotted waste from the compost heap, a very satisfying job. I sowed the seeds rather more thickly than is recommended. My reasoning was that in nature, seeds pour down in huge quantity form the flowers, in order to give the greatest possible chance to successful germinations. I can always thin them later, I thought. One piece of book advice I will follow, though, and that is to sow certain veg every two weeks, thus ensuring a steady crop throughout the summer and into autumn. It is called successional sowing and is surprisingly difficult for the beginner to get their heads around. This is recommended for peas and also turnips. I have written the next sowing date in my gardening notebook to remind me.

Last week I sowed a load of broad beans. I had sowed a packet last October, but of the 40 or so seeds planted, only twelve have made it. They are now about three inches high. Some were lost, I think, in the high winds of winter. After all, we are about 350 metres above sea level. So I sowed the rest of the bed, which measures 10ft by 4ft, with more beans and with any luck we will have a good 40 plants, a whole bedful, where last year we had only half a bedful.

The broccoli plants up there are small and apologetic-looking; they have, however, produced a few spears. I plan to photograph things with my Nikkormat very soon. I imagine that as in all other areas of life, a technological regression will lead directly to fun and freedom.

THE PONY HAS been breaking through our plastic electric fence and cavorting around the farmer’s fields, causing much “inconvenience” in the parlance of contemporary service culture. Victoria has had to go out there with a bucket of treats to attract it back to the yard. Two weeks ago she did this and got caught in a bitter storm and returned in floods of tears. Our friend John Mitchinson came for the weekend and helped me prepare the fence, but still she broke through.

We therefore decided to get down to our local farm shop and buy some fence posts and fencing. And here starts another learning process. Apparently we need what is known as a “fence bumper” and they’re hard work. “There’s a real art to it,” said the ladies at our fantastic local farm supplies shop. We spent £150 on this fencing and one does occasionally wonder whether this is really a landlord’s job, since it’s hid field, but doubtless he wouold argue that now we rent it from him, it is our job to make it stock proof. Anyhow, I don’t mind much because it will give us the opportunity to learn about fencing.

I MADE A visit to Skegness to give a talk. I was the guest of Angie Elliot, a reader, who organised a great night at the Vine Hotel. I spoke—or wittered on—for nearly two hours and then broke my no-drinking-for-Lent resolution, with a pint of local nut brown ale. This was my fifth slip since the beginning of Lent, but I don’t feel bad about these slips, as according to the Catholic Encyclopaedia, Lent is dotted with exemptions. Sundays are commonly excluded from the fast, as are all feast days. In my own case, I have extended Sunday back a few hours and start drinking at nine pm on Saturday nights. I also drank on St David’s Day, and I’m looking forward to St Patrick’s Day. It was the previously mentioned John Mitchinson who told me about the exemptions. I admit that the Saturday night exemption is of my own invention, but still, it’s clear that the Church was flexible on the terms of Lent to the point of laxity. Lent, by the way, was hated by the Puritans, I think because part of the point of fasting was to increase the pleasure of the feast that followed it. This was certainly one of my motivations. I stayed near Skegness with a very old friend who I’d not seen since I was 13 or 14, Kate Buckley, also keeping hens and growing vegetables with her family, and running a very smart guest house in their barn ( www.earlscroftfarm.co.uk). The next morning I had a hangover, even though I’d drunk only one pint of ale and two small cans of Heineken. I thought that was really unfair. This not-drinking business has got to stop. Oh well, four weeks to go and then it’s feasting time.

13.03.07

How to Fish

Chris Yates is known in the angling world as a legendary carp fisherman. He is also the Idler’s tea correspondent. We recommend his beautiful book to anyone interested in either angling or doing nothing, or indeed both, since it is Chris’s belief that fishing is a really about doing nothing except for being with nature.

Buy Now from Amazon.co.uk

Idler 38: The Green Man

Idler 38: The Green Man, or How To Save The World Without Really Trying

The latest issue of the Idler is our best ever. Arguing that the most effective solution for combating climate change is simply to do nothing, since it is man’s interference that has caused the problems in the first place, we once again prove that idleness is next to Godliness. Other highlights of the issue include a massive ukulele special containing all the chords and all you need to know to start your own ukulele orchestra. Plus there is quality writing from Richard Benson, Robert Twigger, John Michel and Bill Drummond.

Buy Now from Amazon.co.uk

How to be Free

HOW TO BE FREE by TOM HODGKINSON

Here are some quotes from the reviews so far:

“One of the most provocatively entertaining, creatively subversive and, frankly, essential manifestoes of this or any moment,” Time Out

“An inspiring collection of historical references and intriguing socio-cultural comment for those of us who yearn to cast off our corporate and consumer shackles,” Psychologies

“Packed with wit, anecdotes and ideas… by the end you’ll want to grow your own vegetables, put on a gig in your living room, or at least read one of the many books he refers to throughout,” The Word

“How To Be Free offers some solutions to escaping the ‘mind-forg’d manacles’…the advice is proffered with wit,” FT

“Crammed with laugh-out-loud jokes and witty putdowns, this acts as a survival guide for everything from government to housework. Random in its details, essential in its advice,” Knave magazine

“He writes in a witty, aphoristic style that is mostly good-humoured and encouraging, which bolsters his central argument that, seeing as life is essentially absurd, we may as well be happy all the time,” New Statesman

Click here to get the book from Amazon at 40% discount:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/0241143217/theidler-21

The Idler Giveaway is over

Thanks to everyone who ordered a copy of War on Work. The free offer is now over.